Check Yourself: Bolide.

Monday, April 27, 2015

Bolide.

\BOH-lahyd, -lid\
noun

1. a large, brilliant meteor, especially one that explodes; fireball.

2. They can be human too.

These are the people you meet in life who sparkle, and shine, and light up your world, but then poof: they spontaneously combust and disappear into the ashes of your memories. And you taste the heat, and you smell the smoke, and you feel the burn.

Their flames seem to consume you, yet most of the time you end up okay.

But, sometimes you are caught in the blaze. You get burned up. You aren't okay at all.

I'm not okay. I'm not okay. I'm not okay. I'm not okay. I'm not okay. I'm not okay. I'm not okay. I'm not okay. I'm not okay. I'm not okay. I'm not okay. I'm not okay. I'm not okay. I'm not okay. I'm not okay. I'm not okay. I'm not okay. I'm not okay. I'm not okay. I'm not okay. I'm not okay. I'm not okay. I'm not okay. I'm not okay. I'm not okay. I'm not okay. I'm not okay. I'm not okay. I'm not okay.
I'm on fire. Can you hear me through the inferno?

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I write...

"You better check yo self before you wreck yo self Cos I'm bad for your health, I come real stealth."

Do I have a single thing in common with Ice Cube? I really don't know. That would be cool if I did. What I do know is the hook to one of his songs is pretty applicable to all people, if we don't “check ourselves” quite frequently we run the danger of wrecking ourselves. We need to think before we speak. We have to think before we act. (I find myself doing neither of those things most of the time).

Yet, I know I really must try to examine my actions, because the stuff I say and do may potentially place me in danger--psychologically, emotionally, spiritually, and even physically--without even realizing it. (I mean, it has... the danger... it's hurt me in every way). This is true for most of us, right? I'm not the only one... Sometimes we're wrecked before we even know what hit us.

All my life I was a strong-willed type of girl. Some people don't appreciate those qualities in a woman, and I have succumbed to the negativity and abuse from those people; it has happened so often, I became fearful... scared.

In fact, the times I am weakened by other people in my life haunt me endlessly. I already let them change me. I'm trying to find myself again.

Checkety check this: I have found that I have to have a sense of humor about everything in life, because a whole lot of things aren't super funny. And, when I dwell on them, I wreck myself... Oh, and I'm such a dweller.